when does this kitten phase end?

At least with a kitten you have only about a year before she gets big and just wants to sit staring at you like you’re a dumb ass. Not like a kid who spends the first two years peeing or puking on things, then about 8 years breaking stuff or writing on it, then spends the next 15 years sitting around staring at you like you’re a dumb ass. [Oldest Daughter] is already in that period. It's funny- she does really well at school and everyone loves her. I mean, I got an email from her band teacher who nominated her for student of the month once, a phone call from her social studies teacher just to tell me how wonderful she is and a handwritten note from principal of the school thanking me for “letting her come to [Middle School].” Seriously, I didn’t think teachers had time for that. But at home she tends to get an attitude. It's funny how that works. Sometimes I wonder, is it me that has the bad attitude? I mean, after all, everyone else thinks she’s perfect! Weird.

Maybe you have a special needs kitty. Oh and I guess you did say your kitty is a boy, so maybe that is the problem. [Youngest/Son] is a lot more destructive than either of the girls and he just instinctively hones in on things I don’t want him to touch. I don’t imagine I will be getting the same type of correspondence from the junior high when he is attending. Maybe something more like “have you considered any of the other fine schools that maybe you would prefer your son to attend?” and things like that.

2:18 PM

third sunday of advent + 3

9:01 AM

twinkle

I put up lights this year. I got those teeny little white lights and some teeny little blue ones, too. I can't stand the icicles or multi-colored big bulbs, so know I shopped for weeks trying to find these things. They're up and on the deck, which is something I haven't done in years, because it's not so much the celebration of Christmas as it is of global warming.

12:14 PM

back to back cat posts

I still use a water bottle when Al-Ḥalīm Netanyahu acts up. It might have been OK for cats to jump on counters in the day of the caveman, but it's considered crossing the line ever since modern man invented the tampon.

It's been a rainy week, but today it's absolutely pouring and isn't letting up. The kitten can't tear himself away from the windows and can't imagine what those plants must have done that was so bad. So very, very bad.

10:57 AM

not your grandmother's dinner

I don't bother cooking dinner for myself on the weekdays. (I get home too late and don't have anyone to do the dishes.) Eating fast food, picked up from a window, makes me feel gross, so, instead, I eat a lot of Trader Joe's fast food, not picked up at a window. That makes me feel somewhat less greasy and much more vegan, even when I'm eating smoked salmon. Also, most of their fast food says "organic" on the label, which makes the Nomadic Waste Management Specialist/Homeless Guy who takes my recyclables think I'm really healthy. (Why wouldn't I care what he thinks about me?)



See the carrots? My, how healthy. And that? That, kind sir, is cat food. Seriously, the picture above is cat food and it looks better than what I tried to cook for myself last Sunday. I'm used to wet cat food looking more like this:



No, this is 2009 and this is what cat food looks like:



Maybe I should add that this is what cat food looks like when it's $1.99 per can. Normally, I would never spend that kind of money on cat food. Technically I didn't, because Centinela had a buy-one-get-one-free sale. Yes, they have those a lot, which is part of the love. The Natural Balance LID and Merrick that Al-Ḥalīm Netanyahu usually eats costs a lot less, but it's Christmas and I don't have the heart to tell him he's not getting that new cat tree he's been highlighting in all of those catalogs he conveniently leaves around the house.

I know. I can't believe I'm that lady, either.

2:47 PM

not to invite further comparisons, but...

I've been moisturizing with raw shea butter for about two months now and my face is as soft as a baby's ass. You'll have to trust me, as the Internet has yet to satisfy my need to share texture, but it's really soft. Really.

2:19 PM

world AIDS day

I don't care who (or where) you are, everyone can find a few free hours.

11:53 AM